Thursday, 26 November 2009

Macavity - The Mystery Cat

This reminds me of my own bad tempered, moaning Mog.

By T S Eliot

Macavity's a Mystery Cat:he's called the Hidden Paw

For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.

He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:

For when they reach the scene of crime--Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no on like Macavity,

He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.

His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,

And when you reach the scene of crime--Macavity's not there!

You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air--

But I tell you once and once again, Macavity's not there!

Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;

You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.

His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly domed;

His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.

He sways his head from side to side, with movements like a snake;

And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake.

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,

For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.

You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square--

But when a crime's discovered, then Macavity's not there!

He's outwardly respectable. (They say he cheats at cards.)

And his footprints are not found in any file of Scotland Yard's.

And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,

Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled,

Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair--

Ay, there's the wonder of the thing! Macavity's not there!

And when the Foreign Office finds a Treaty's gone astray,

Or the Admiralty lose some plans and drawings by the way,

There may be a scap of paper in the hall or on the stair--

But it's useless of investigate--Macavity's not there!

And when the loss has been disclosed, the Secret Service say:

"It must have been Macavity!"--but he's a mile away.

You'll be sure to find him resting, or a-licking of his thumbs,

Or engaged in doing complicated long division sums.

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macacity,

There never was a Cat of such deceitfulness and suavity.

He always has an alibit, or one or two to spare:

And whatever time the deed took place--MACAVITY WASN'T THERE!

And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are widely known

(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)

Are nothing more than agents for the Cat who all the time

Just controls their operations: the Napoleon of Crime!

Good old macavity.


Friday, 20 November 2009

I’ve not been well you know

I’ve had the Porky flu this week
The outlook it was very bleak
Until the Pork Flu site I found
And now I feel my health is sound

I got my meds from my flu friend
And with my Lemsips made a blend
That kept the nasty bug at bay
To live to post another day

I must admit it did feel bad
But now I feel a bit more glad
I’m out of bed and on the sofa
Instead of sleep I can just loaf

Around in comfort in my home
For three more days before I roam
Again into the world outside
Without a Flu Friend for a guide

It’s good to feel OK again
Because the Pork Flu is a bane
It’s good to write to some degree
Although some readers might disagree

Porky Flu can mar your week
And really make the future bleak
But Tamiflu came to the rescue
Or maybe not, you could argue


© Angus Dei

Angus Dei on all and sundry


Angus Dei politico

Friday, 13 November 2009

We To Sigh Instead of Sing

By James Whitcomb Riley

Thought this would be apt.

"Rain and rain! And rain and rain!"
Yesterday we muttered
Grimly as the grim refrain
That the thunders uttered:
All the heavens under cloud -
All the sunshine sleeping;
All the grasses limply bowed
With their weight of weeping.

Sigh and sigh! And sigh and sigh!
Never end of sighing;
Rain and rain for our reply -
Hopes half drowned and dying;
Peering through the window-pane,
Naught but endless raining -
Endless sighing, and as vain,
Endlessly complaining,

Shine and shine! And shine and shine!
Ah! To-day the splendor!
All this glory yours and mine -
God! But God is tender!
We to sigh instead of sing,
Yesterday, in sorrow,
While the Lord was fashioning
This for our To-morrow!

Monday, 9 November 2009

Wee, sleekit, cow'rin', tim'rous beastie

After posting about good old “ratty” on Angus Dei on all and sundry it reminded of the poem by Robbie Burns.

So here it is:

Wee, sleekit, cow'rin', tim'rous beastie,
O what a panic's in thy breastie!
Thou need na start awa sae hasty,
Wi' bickering brattle!
I wad be laith to rin an' chase thee
Wi' murd'ring pattle!

I'm truly sorry man's dominion
Has broken nature's social union,
An' justifies that ill opinion
Which makes thee startleAt me,
thy poor earth-born companion,
An' fellow-mortal!

I doubt na, whiles, but thou may thieve;
What then? poor beastie, thou maun live!
A daimen-icker in a thrave
'S a sma' request:
I'll get a blessin' wi' the lave,
And never miss't!

Thy wee bit housie, too, in ruin!
Its silly wa's the win's are strewin':
And naething, now, to big a new ane,
O' foggage green!
An' bleak December's winds ensuin
'Baith snell an' keen!

Thou saw the fields laid bare and waste
An' weary winter comin' fast,
An' cozie here, beneath the blast,
Thou thought to dwell,
Till, crash! the cruel coulter past
Out thro' thy cell.

That wee bit heap o' leaves an' stibble
Has cost thee mony a weary nibble!
Now thou's turned out, for a' thy trouble,
But house or hald,
To thole the winter's sleety dribble
An' cranreuch cauld!

But, Mousie, thou art no thy lane
In proving foresight may be vain:
The best laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft a-gley,
An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain,
For promised joy.

Still thou art blest, compared wi' me!
The present only toucheth thee:
But, oh! I backward cast my e'e
On prospects drear!
An' forward, tho' I canna see,
I guess an' fear!

Angus Dei on all and sundry


Angus Dei politico

Saturday, 7 November 2009

A Poem For Those Over 50 with a computer

A computer was something on TV
From a science fiction show of note
A window was something you hated to clean
And ram was the cousin of a goat.

Meg was the name of my girlfriend
And gig was a job for the nights
Now they all mean different things
And that really mega bites.

An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A curser used profanity
A keyboard was a piano.

Memory was something that you lost with age
A CD was a bank account
And if you had a 3 inch floppy
You hoped nobody found out.

Compress was something you did to the garbage
Not something you did to a file.
And if you unzipped anything in public
You'd be in jail for awhile.

Log on was adding wood to the fire
Hard drive was a long trip on the road
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And a back up happened to your commode.

Cut you did with a pocket knife.
Paste you did with glue
A web was a spider's home
And a virus was the flu.

I guess I'll stick to my pad and paper
And the memory in my head
I hear nobody's been killed in a computer crash
But when it happens, they'll wish they were dead.

Author Unknown

Angus Dei on all and sundry


Angus Dei politico

Sunday, 1 November 2009

A walk in the rain

I’ve just been out for a walk in the rain
Up the road and down the lane
A gale was blowing the rain was flowing
And my brolly turned inside out

My boots are soaking my socks are dripping
Through my mac the rain was ripping
My hair’s awry but I will defy
The weather from the sky

I was blown along by the wind so strong
As I flew down the lane at speed
Cause the rain in my face made my heart race
I’m glad that I went I concede

My clothes are all wet but I won’t fret
They’ll dry out soon enough
The weather’s no threat
To the joy that I found galloping along the ground

I’m back home now in the warm and the calm
And watch the rain through the glass
It’s nice to be out of the rainy storm
But I hope that feeling lasts

Of the wind in my hair
And the rain on my face
The trees whipping back and forth
And the feel of natures strength

It struck a chord did that rainy walk
Of days that now have gone
Of walks in the rain with another
But now I walk alone

©Angus Dei